{phfr} in January

 Pretty-Seed pods in a wintry garden. We had a few days of very cold but sunny weather before the heavy rains began. It was lovely!

 Happy- Estelle enjoying birthday tea on her eighth birthday.

 Funny- Stuart really does seem to be able to sleep anywhere. He can also sleep even with the most incredible din going on around him!

Real- Sometimes those shots you think will be good pictures capture little moments of terror, like Stuart thinking he was caught in the hedge. He emerged unscathed a second after I snapped the picture, much to everyone's relief!

Joining Like Mother, Like Daughter for another week of {phfr}, finding the contentment in the ordinary days which make up our rich, full lives!

My mother

Today is my mother's 78th birthday. I have always, after hearing her story, marveled at her. I am amazed that she lived through her childhood, and in awe of her cheerful, forgiving spirit. My mother was born to missionary parents in China. The little village where my grandparents lived was high up in the mountains, a three day journey by buggy to the city where my mother was born. When she was two weeks old, her parents took her home from the hospital the same way-by buggy. On the second day of their journey, they were robbed by Chinese bandits who held a gun to my little two week old mother's head and demanded my grandparent's watches and wedding bands. She routinely found scorpions in her bed and shoes, was almost bitten by a green mamba in India, found a live hand grenade and picked it up, and when she was walking to a swimming pool with her brother (in Calcutta after the war), walked right past a cobra which was coiled and ready to strike.  I am truly amazed she is alive. But the most amazing thing about my mother is the fact that after being held as a little girl in a concentration camp for 5 years, she has totally forgiven her captors and bears no ill will for her experience. She was sent to a boarding school for missionary's children at the age of 6, and just a few months later, the Japanese invaded their school, moved them out, and after holding them in a camp for a few weeks, loaded them in trains and hauled them in to the mountains where they spent the next five years. In 1961, she moved to Japan to teach in a school for missionary children, and still, to this day, has a real love for Japan and the Japanese people. My mother has a great sense of fun. I often came home from school to find she had made my bed, only to discover at bedtime that it has been short-sheeted and I could not get in to bed! She would rig cups of water over doorways so that they would fall on us when we opened the doors, put plastic wrap in between the toilet bowl and the seat, and put salt in our coffee if we did not guard it carefully. She wrote me every week when I was in college, even though I was only 40 miles away. I don't often give flowery speeches about the ones I love, or write stirring, emotional tributes, or write love letters. I don't give those cards with gushing prose in them, just a blank card will suffice, thank you! However, let it be known far and wide that my mother is a wonderful person, an excellent mother, and a pleasure to be around. I love her dearly, and want to be just like her when I grow up. Although, I have taken a solemn pledge that I will never, ever make my family tuna noodle casserole with crushed chips on top for dinner. Other than that, she is worthy of emulating in every way!

January

My little blog has been silent these last three weeks. Plenty has been happening, but for some reason, I feel quiet. Perhaps it is because I am suddenly faced with my mother's sharp decline over the last few
 weeks, and my mind is awash with questions about what to do for her. Assisted living? Memory care? Here or there? Move her without telling her about it first, without getting her input? These are uncharted waters, and the going is rough. In some ways, even though she is in great physical shape, I feel as if I have already lost my mother. However, after touring lots of assisted living and memory care facilities, and having lots of conversations (and dreams!) about the whole situation, I think we have found a good solution for her. The hardest part will be just waltzing in and telling her we are moving her. I am dreading this. I do know that once she is closer to us and settled in, we will all breath easier knowing we can keep a closer eye on her. I look forward to being able to see her more often, and hope she will retain a certain amount of lucidity for a while yet. January has been a lovely month, with barn dances and epiphany parties and birthday parties and big bowls of hot soup to warm us after playing in the powdered sugar dusting of snow we received. Homemade ricotta cheese is draining right now, and we will eat it slathered on top of hot bread with dinner tonight. My intent is to be a bit better about keeping up my blog. On the other hand, sometimes silence is golden!

A year in review

January- Estelle turns seven!

February- Rain. Lots of rain. But when the sun shone, it was beautiful!

March- More rain!

April- Cherry blossom time!

May- Strawberry planting!

June- the return of the flowers!

July- Harvest season! Blueberry crates ready for the cannery.

August- All eleven cousins together for one night full of crazy fun. 21 attempts at a good group picture for my mother for Christmas. She got a scarf instead!

September-last breakfast on the porch of the store before school begins!

October- Beautiful hickory tree just before losing it's leaves.

November- The end of the farm season, the return of the grey.

A really good Thanksgiving with friends.

December- Christmas morning!

Playing Happy family on Christmas.Grateful for good friends , both for the farmer and I and our children.

Christmas tree, harvested, set up in the house, and decorated by the children with no help from us! I think they did a lovely job!

2011 is drawing to a close. I don't have any new resolutions (always the same ones-lose weight, exercise more, be more disciplined, and so on!) and I don't have a wise or witty look at the year past to offer.  But as I think about the events of the last year, all the stress and sorrow and joy and moments of laughing until I was crying, the words of one of my favorite hymns come to mind. And I am grateful that the words to this song have proven true! There is nothing else to say-God has been my help, and is my hope for the years to come!

Oh God our help in ages past

Our hope for years to come

Our shelter from the stormy blast

And our eternal home

Under the shadow of thy wings

Still may we dwell secure

Sufficient is thine are alone

And our defense is sure

{phfr} Christmas version

 Pretty- my niece (on the left) and my daughter. The look alike cousins!

 Happy- Stuart with his new trucks. Notice his other loves represented here- the fire man's hat and the Thomas the Tank Engine shirt.

 Funny- I don't know what was being discussed here, but love that everyone has their head in their hands. Was it bad news? Or are they just simply exhausted by the round of Christmas festivities?

 Real- TOO MUCH CHOCOLATE!!!!!! I never thought I would say it, but I am sick of chocolate!

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas with family and friends. These pictures (minus the last one of my son asleep under our tree) were all taken at my sister's house, where we were celebrating Christmas (on the third day of Christmas!) with my sisters and mother. Joining Like Mother Like Daughter for another round of {PHFR}, finding and recognizing contentment in the everyday. Now, I realize that Christmas is not the everyday, but the joys of time spent with family and friends carry on into the ordinary days, and the coming of our Lord and Savior makes it possible to find contentment and peace in everyday life.

Christmas Eve peace

The halls are decked, the turkey is ready to roast, the house is covered with lights, and I just took a hazelnut cake out of the oven. The tree is up and decorated (I think it is a little bit crooked....) and this year, the children did most of the decorating. I am so looking forward to our Christmas meal tomorrow evening, shared with good friends. The house is ready, and all is merry and bright. Monday afternoon will find us celebrating Christmas with the farmer's family. Have I said before how blessed I am in the in law department? His family rocks. Wishing you and yours a happy and blessed Christmas!

So! I know it is almost Christmas, and that I should be full of good cheer and rejoicing. But, honestly, I am not feeling the love. It has been a long week of sinus infection and nasty cough, capped by a trip to the doctor (who looked like Andy Warhol) and a mishap involving my husbands truck and a tree. The trip to the doctor's office was half funny, half really, really aggravating. I know I should be nothing but grateful for medical care, and the money to pay for the office visit. However, 75 minutes of sitting in a waiting room full of sick, angry people clouded my outlook..



I know in my head that Jesus came in to this world of darkness to bring light, consolation, and hope. I know that my focus should be that, and that if I could see it clearly, I would indeed be consoled. But somehow, this miracle of the greatest gift of all has been obscured by the daily stresses that have become my companions, and I don't know how to turn this event, this tiny baby coming as the Savior of the world, into peace and joy in my own life. Well advising friends would remind me to turn my focus outward, and focus on making the day a special one of celebration for my children. I can do that, and I will. Yet, at the same time, I want to regain this sense of wonder and joy, to throw my head back and laugh, to stand up tall and say the words " It is all good" and mean them.


A large part of my angst stems from missing my dad. I have been thinking about Christmases past, and the things my dad always did to make Christmas special. Christmas is not the same without a long walk, an afternoon of playing the new game he always bought us, and a dish of the Melt-a-Way mints he always bought at Hickory Farms. And my mom? She has started referring to my family as "those friends of ours with the land." I am sad that she doesn't always remember who we are, can't recall our names.

The truth is, I am neither depressed or terribly gloomy, and I know that when I wake up in the morning feeling better than I did today (if the anti-biotic does it's work...) things will seem much better. Tonight, I am just not feeling the Christmas joy!